SkintightTransformation

Why I Stopped Blogging (And why I'm back)

A lot has happened

My life pretty much got turned upside down about a year (maybe a little more than a year ago).  My wife, Sharon started going through major health issues.   Thankfully, we’re on the other side of most of what was going on.  As a result, blogging as a priority, became a pretty low item.

 

I let things slip

I don’t know if you can relate, but when things start getting behind, it get harder and harder to pick them back up again.  Basically that’s what happened with me too.  The more time transpired between my last post the more difficult it was to pick things back up again.

 

I have something to say

I don’t always have something to say, but I do like sharing from my life.  This time I’m going to focus my blog on just a few topics and I’ll be less “random”.  Those topics (which are on the top navigation bar) are:

• Small Groups (It’s my job at Canyon Ridge and I love talking about how to help people grow through community)
• Church Health (One of my life passions is to see churches become more healthy.  At Canyon Ridge I lead a team of people focus on our health as a church.  Also, check out Legacy Coaching for more information on how to bring your church’s health up!)
• Leadership (Leadership is an indispensible part of any church’s vision and mission.  I love leadership; I love leaders and I love share leadership principles)
• Coaching (Coaching is about helping to bring about change in people’s lives and in organizations.  Coaching is one of the best ways to join with the Holy Spirit’s work through transformational conversations.)
• Family (I love what I learn through my family.  Not everything that happens in my life can be shared on my blog and not everything is worth sharing, but certainly when I can I love to share what God is teaching me through my family)

 

My Small Group

I had a plan for my small group tonight. I thought we were going to do a study out of the book of Joshua. I thought I was going to lead. But nope, God had a different plan. Over the last month, we've added two new people to our group (which is a very good thing). Whenever you add new people to a small group you have to give everyone time to 'gel'. Tonight was all about gellin'. Our community/fellowship time where we stand around and raid the snacks rolled right into the time where we would normally do our study. As our time together progressed we were all able to share about what was really going on in their lives. And the awesome part was that other people in the group we're facilitating life-giving conversations. As the leader of my group I got to sit back and watch God use the stories of others to encourage and minister to one another. We never did our study, but as someone mentioned, we were definitely 'groupin'!

Sometimes the best time as a leader is when God inspires others to lead and to do the ministering instead of you. I just need to make sure I'm not standing in the way with my plans when He does this!

Small Group Myths: Management

Myth #8: I can manage my small groups from the church office.

"Hi, this is the Small Group Pastor, how may I connect you?"

Wouldn't it be nice to sit at the big switchboard of community in your church? Plugging people in, connecting people to growth plans and potential leaders to their groups and watch the results pour in?

Whether this is your ideal situation or not, it's impossible. Leading groups and a small group system requires you to get your hands dirty. Leaders need to be close enough to what they're leading so that their pursuit of Christ likeness rubs off on those they are leading. There has to be the kind of relationships that produce transformational conversations. We're talking about conversations that bring about life change.

You can't do that from an office. And it won't be done in the lives of group leaders until we do it in the lives of their leaders first.

The Truth? Leading a Small Group system requires me to get in the lives of the people I lead and to let them into my life as well.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

…to Myth #7

Small Group Myths: Success

Small Group Myths: Success

Myth #7: You Measure Quality through Good Reporting

How do you know that your groups system is producing what you want? What are your measurables; the tangible evidence that it is working? Numbers are helpful. How many people in groups and how many groups tell us quantity, but what about the quality of our small groups?

Can reporting do this? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say no. Reporting, in my opinion is too clinical, too far removed and not organic to be the primary way to measure quality. If you get a good report or a bad report (sorry, I mean a report with a growth opportunity) you have to come to terms with the fact that all of those numbers mean people…and if you have people, then you're going to need relationships in order to have an impact on the people. Of course, you could always file it and ignore it! (that's my temptation!).

To know the quality, we're going to have to people who are known by those who care for them. This means having relationships that go all the way from the person in the group, to their leader, to the leader's leader and even you! In other words if you want to know the quality of your groups system it has to be done by having a relationship with the people who are leading the leaders.

Success can't be about the numbers. Even if we can get 100% of our people involved in a group, we can't be satisfied with that as the main goal. The group system actually has to be moving people forward to their next step in growth.

The Truth? A Successful Small Group Ministry is more concerned with moving people and leaders forward in their relationship with God through relationships than the number of participation.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

…to Myth #6

Small Group Myths: Appreciation

Small Group Myths: Appreciation

Myth #6: My Leaders Feel Appreciated

The alternate title for this post could be: I'll remember to appreciate leaders.

Let's face it, we're all pretty busy. And having leaders that you don't see on a regular basis is problematic to making sure that they feel appreciated. Group leaders are, by the nature of their job, leading outside of the church. If we want to keep our leaders and maintain their commitment, then we need to do a good job letting them know how much we appreciate them.

I believe a good rule of thumb when it comes to appreciating our leaders is: I need to do more. Whatever the bar is at right now, consider raising it. And when you've done that raise it some more.

At Canyon Ridge, we have a budget line for appreciation. We have a yearly event we appreciate all of our volunteers. This fall the church gathered all of the leaders together. We took this opportunity to treat some of our leaders to a special dinner.

What are some ideas that you have for appreciating your leaders?

The Truth? We need to appreciate our leaders more.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

…to Myth #5

Small Group Myths: Training

Myth #5: We need trained Leaders

I used to do a lot of worrying about if we were training leaders enough. I used to wonder if we had enough follow-up training for leaders to get. Having trained leaders is still a priority, but you won't hear me saying, "We need more training for our leaders!" Instead, I've come to realize that having leaders who have a solid relationship with their coach (or whatever you call a leader of leaders in your church) will go a lot further than a well trained leader.

This is because a well connected leader has someone in their life that they can ask questions of and depend on if things seem like they are getting beyond their abilities. A well connected leader has someone who is thinking about their personal discipleship and their next spiritual growth steps (just like they're doing for their group members).

We've been using this kind of hands on approach for over a year now at Canyon Ridge. We're still implementing because relational systems take longer than traditional methods of training. I wonder if Jesus could have prepared the disciples faster with more training events. J

The Truth? We need more well connected leaders.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

...to Myth #4

Small Group Myths: Purpose

Myth #4: The purpose for small groups is for true Biblical community

Have you ever said these words…

"Get into a group so you can get connected…"
"When you get into a group you are able to develop good relationships."
"We have groups because God wants us to be in community with each other."
"Small groups are a place for us to find friends."

If you're saying yeah, so what? Then you're a lot like me before I started to see the missing element here. The call being made is community for the sake of having community. This will appeal to some people (mostly lonely people), but not to the people who are asking why is this important.

Take a step back. What's the purpose of community? If it's not to make disciples then it doesn't fit into the Great Commission! If that is true then why don't we say, "Get in a group it's a place where you can grow. At Canyon Ridge, we've been saying, "The best environment for discipleship is community." We really believe that community is the catalyst for personal discipleship. Its how Jesus did it. It's why he took his disciples with him instead of teaching them in a class. Life creates circumstances for change and growth and if we're living together we can expect to grow together.

The Truth? The purpose for small groups is for people to be discipled.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

...to Myth #3

Small Group Myths: Essentials

This week I'm continuing my series of "Small Group Myths"

Myth #3: The most important element for small groups to succeed is… Connecting Process, Leadership Training, Good Coaches…

So, what is the foundational element of a good group system? Or let's make the question easier, what are the various foundational elements? Some might say a good connecting process, or a good coaching system. Others may say it varies and depends on what your weakest area is.

I think it's all of them…and none of them.

They're all important. Every system is a vital system; otherwise it wouldn't be in your system. What matters most is that there is stability and consistency in your various small group systems. I can't think of any church that I would rate as doing small groups well that keeps on changing everything. Instead, the leaders and the churches experiencing the best level of health in their groups are STABLE! They've locked on to something and they're sticking with it. They're not looking for the latest small group trend (you know there are a lot of them!). Instead they're sticking to the basics and improving on what they have instead of throwing out the old plan and starting from scratch.

The Truth? The most important element for small groups to succeed is stability.

**These comments are from my personal learnings and not directed at any person or church's group strategy**

...to Myth #2